welcome to the church of evil jesus
When your evil prayers are answered, who do you thank?
Who can you pray to for the strength to crush your rivals? Who gives you courage as you dash out of the restaurant without paying? Whose is the voice that rings through yours as you give a stirring ovation on the merits of fossil fuels?
Satan? Doubtful. That pretentious jerk isn't interested in helping anybody.
No, the deity you're looking for is Evil Jesus
Welcome to our family. Our evil family.